Clueless in Seattle

To quote good ole Charlie Brown of the Peanuts cartoons: "Oh good grief."

In the spirit of - certainly not the holidays - being politically correct, the Seattle-Tacoma International Airport took down its nine Christmas trees. It seems that a rabbi, Elazar Bogomilsky, had requested a menorah be put up alongside the trees to equalize things.

Now that seems like a reasonable request. Hanaukah begins Friday and although some unenlightened people refer to it as Jewish Christmas, it is a totally different kind of holiday. It simply falls the same time of year and involves gift exchanging, but to a lesser degree than Christmas.

But it seems the good rabbi put a typically American spin on the situation. If the airport didn't put up a menorah, he'd get a lawyer and sue. Lawyers, grinches, all part of the holiday tradition, right?

So the airport threw up its hands and said, take down the trees.

And the rabbi seems baffled by this.

"Evryone should have their spirit of the holiday," he said. "For many people the trees are the spirit of the holidays, and adding a menorah adds light to the season."

Hiring a lawyer adds what?

Here's what his lawyer has to say: "They've darkend the halls instead of turning the lights up," said Harvey Grad. "There is a concern here that the Jewish community will be portrayed as the Grinch."

They were expecting, maybe, the three wise men?

An airport spokesman said the trees came down because the airport staff is busy and doesn't have time "to play cultural anthropologists."

Here's a flash for the rabbi and his lawyer. A Christmas tree has as much to do with the religoius connection to Christmas as a glass of eggnog. It's not a religious symbol; it's a tradition. Kind of like Santa and his reindeer, snowmen and cookies. Get over yourselves.

You may not realize this but some Gentiles are envious that Hanukah hasn't taken on the gigantic greed proportions Christmas has, but has remained largely a religious observance. If you want to get your panties in a wad over something, how about the larceny that little children show with their lists of "I wants" for Santa. Bemoan the retail industry's reliance on Christmas gift sales to keep them afloat the rest of the year. Join us in our headshaking as we watch shoppers take on a mob mentality in an effort to get the latest gadget - purposely limited in number to create a feeding frenzy - so they can sell the item on eBay for twice what they paid for it in the name of "making someone's Christmas a little brighter" - namely their own for scoring a huge profit.

So now, at least in Seattle at the airport, there are no Christmas trees, no menorahs, no festivity of any kind to enlighten travelers.

Instead of dragging a lawyer into this, Rabbi Bogomilsky should have instead empoyed a little creativity. Don't think of them as Christmas trees. There were no cedar trees in Bethlehem - certainly no artificial trees with red bows and ribbons. Think of them as Hanukah bushes.

Makes about as much sense, and certainly doesn't have to involve a lawyer.