Parade was wrong

Last week's Parade magazine published an article comparing cats to dogs as perfect pets. Dogs won.

Well, of course the research was flawed! Obviously the research panel was stacked in favor of dogs. The criteria that determined which pet is better favored the canine bunch.

No one judged either animal on sarcasm. Cats would win paws down. When I give my cat Arthur food he doesn't like, he draws his paw over it like it's something nasty in his litter box. Show me a dog with an opinion!

Generosity. Dogs will bring you anything you throw away, and call it a game of fetch. A cat will bring you something she actually went out and chose: a not-quite-dead mouse.

Parade gave dogs points for herding. Said it was part of the canine work ethic. Cats can herd just as well as dogs can, but they don't limit themselves to sheep or cattle. Cats herd humans -- from the living room to the kitchen to where the cat food and kitty treats are kept. Talk about leadership skills!

Dogs may be loyal and all that, but what dog will risk his life to make sure the food you're eating won't poison you. Both my cats are right there on the spot at every meal, making sure that my meat isn't tainted. If that isn't love I don't know know what is.

Cat people are a different breed of ... well ... cat. We can see the hidden talents of our feline-Americans and should have been better represented on Parade's panel of judges.

Besides, there's nothing more comforting than snuggling up with a sleepy cat and listening to it purr. Show me a dog that can do that!