A conspiracy is afoot

It was interesting to learn recently that some scientists claim they have not only photographic proof that Bigfoot is real. They have DNA evidence.

Apparently according to the scientists, funded by a businessman with nowhere else to spend his money, there are Sasquatch (Bigfoot) throughout the United States. They have families. They travel together. They may even have their own language, and before long they're going to be seen standing in line at Walmart.

Nobody is willing to confirm it yet, but I have a theory about the sudden DNA evidence and the growing Sasquatch population.

Bigfoot is preparing to take over Washington. They've eluded everyone for years, so they're impervious to NSA interference. That is a good thing.

They've managed to exist all this time without government handouts. If they have any kind of commerce at all, they've managed to avoid paying taxes on it. They're not likely to find taxes important when they take over.

Agriculture interests will be pleased since Bigfoot is accustomed to living off the land.

They have little, if any knowledge, of such cultural phenomenon as fast food, tweeting, twerking, or tipping. They no nothing of the Kardashians or Miley Cyrus. They don't know a Republican from a Democrat. In their world, they're all equal. Unpleasant smelling and ugly as dirt, but they're all equal. 

For at least several generations into the future the Sasquatch Party would have no need of the DNR, EPA, Department of Education, HUD, and the other alphabet soup of agencies. Their philosophy is simple: mind your own business and keep your nose clean.

As Washington gets its collective nose out of joint over who's got the most marbles in the political circle in the dirt, Bigfoot is getting ready to march on Washington and kick them all out into the forest where they will be hunted down by reality TV producers. Should be a piece of cake since everything is closed and Congress is busy with rhetorical mooning from the floor. No one will see it happen until it's all said and done.

And when it's all said and done, I think it will be an improvement.